This is brilliant

I for one welcome our new lumpy overlords.

It’s time to cut our losses and pull the plug on this unwinnable exercise in imperialistic hubris. It’s time to face the fact that the war on cancer is over, and that cancer has won.

... Did somebody say “Mission Accomplished”?

How will history account for such a miserable failure of a war? Many would argue that we never should have gone to war with cancer in the first place. The very idea that American medical science could control a process as elemental as malignant cellular proliferation is emblematic of a type of hubris only Americans are capable of.

... this endless war on cancer has been a distraction from the real enemy: heart disease. Heart attacks kill more Americans than cancer, yet there’s been no talk of a “war” on heart disease. Meanwhile the dead and the maimed in our war on cancer continue to pile up, but they’re rarely mentioned anymore because the corporate-controlled media has moved onto the next story about dieting, K-Fed, or pretty white girls who go missing on Spring Break. Meanwhile, untold billions have been frittered away on this un-winnable cancer war, money that could have been spent beefing up security at our ports, on our borders, or wherever Rep. Cynthia McKinney might attempt to enter a federal building next.

Wake up, America.